Who’s Driving?

by Freeman Payne with art by Dustin Burkett

“Alvin got a new car!”
“Alvin got a new car!”
Soon everyone had heard, their excited exclamations buzzing In Alvin’s psyche.

Soon little guy and little Alv were talking with Guy and Alv. They all liked cars.
“What kind is it?”
“I don’t know” Guy continued. “I heard Alvin talking and he said it’s a 1963 Chevy Impala station wagon”
“A station wagon! What a dud!”
“No, no it’s not…It’s a drag car. It’s blown, fuel-injected, drag slicks and road legal!”
“What’s that mean?” Lil guy asked.
“I don’t know…but is sure sounds cool.”
“Yea….buuuutt…Who gets to drive?”

Lil Alv and Lil Guy turned to see Alv and Guy.
“I bet he got it for Mom. She’s been driving us a lot.”
“I don’t know Lil Alv; addiction has been driving a lot too,” Alv chimed,
Their worry written on their faces.
All of them had problems when addiction drove the psyche.

“I want to drive first!”
“Stop jumping around Lil guy! What are you? A Mexican jumping bean?”
“This is strange,” said Alv. “Only four of us can go along so that means two of us won’t get to go.”
“Yea, you know mom and dad will go. They always drive us.”
They all looked at each other with somber faces. The two younger boys crying.
This was really scary for Alvin’s psyche; Alvin had never been in the driver’s seat. He’d always been in the back seat staring out the window watching wherever Mom, Dad, religion, or addiction had driven him.
No one knew who was going to drive. Much less how everyone was going to fit into the car and still have room for all their stuff. This was going to change things.

Alvin got his new car on Friday. It was now Monday and the anxiety was driving all six of them bonkers.
Lil Alv was alone today. Lil guy had gone to be with mommy. It was really Alvin’s wife but no one could tell the difference. The entire psyche was sitting around playing chess.

Check.
“Whaaa….” Lil Guy came storming into the room, diving into Big Guys arms. Big guy and big Alv kinda knew what was going on. They too were scared but being twelve they understood more of what was happening. All their attention was on Lil Guy. After a few minutes he fell silent. Tears welling in his eyes he locked them on Big Guy.
“He threw her out…waaaa,” he screamed, bursting into tears.
“Who’s gone?”
“Moohhhmmmiiieeeee…..” His wails echoing into the silence.

Over the next hour the silence continued as Alvin happily went about his day.
Soon he took each part of the psyche and explained to them what was going on.
Lil guy and Lil Alv came back trying to figure out what Alvin meant by claiming them. They went to ask Alv and Guy but Alvin had already taken them.
“So what do you think he meant?”
“I don’t know Lil Alv, Alvin said he liked us, that we were a part of him, even the bad stuff.”
“What about being core Lil Alv. Any idea what that means?
About that time, Alv and Guy showed up. They asked them but they too still didn’t get the big picture. They just kept mumbling.

“We’re all one person?”
“We are him?”

It was way too much for them to understand.
Soon Big Guy and Big Alv returned.
“Get your stuff,” they bellowed. Both knew the big picture and that meant neither one of them got to drive.
Big Guy was helping all the guys
Big Alv was helping all the Alvs. It took awhile but soon all six of them were sitting by the mountainous piles of their stuff. Each talking things over, trying to figure out what would happen next.
“What I don’t get, Big Alv, is that we’ve never all got to go along for the ride before.”
“You know,” Big guy continued “It was Mommy, Old mom, Dad, addiction, religion and only one of us got to go along. We’ve never seen Alvin all at the same time.”

“Yea!” they all chimed.
“And look at us; we’re all sitting together, we’ve never done that before”

VROOM VROOM…RUMBLERUMBLERUMBLE…BANG!

Alvin has started the car.
Everyone stood in awe as he pulled up in a ’63 Impala wagon drag car. It was a bright lemon yellow with purple/blue/orange flames running its entire length. It was one hot machine.
It rumbled to a stop. Alvin chocked it down and was soon admiring the car along with his entire psyche.

“Well, let’s load up,” Alvin exclaimed.
All the Alv’s and Guys just looked at him. The question of who was going to drive was finally at hand.
Each one looked to him, longing to slide behind the wheel.
“I’m driving” Alvin spoke boldly. And with authority.

“No one else, from now on it’s just me.”
“What about our stuff?” Lil Alv whined
“All our excess baggage stays.”
“But…but…”
“Hey guys, this is ME,” he said pointing to each one of them.
“Each of you contributes to me and make me a whole person. I accept each of you and I claim each of you as my own. Your problems are my problems. Your hurts and pains are my hurts and pains. You are all me and we are all one.

Alvin designated seating arrangements and got in.
“Fingers on noses” he said.
WE all did. The automatic doors shut. We were finally all together, One person, happily going along with Alvin finally in the driver’s seat.

StateoftheOzarks Writers Artists Night 2022